So for each of the 10 decades of his remarkable life, we’ve collected 3 themes, a 10-year vision that guided him during that time, and a story from that time. Stories are summarized as told by Dad, and have not been verified for historical accuracy, as accuracy was, afterall, never the point of his stories.
1927-1936. Age 0-9
Walburg, TX
3 Themes
Family
Zion Lutheran Church and School
The Great Depression
10-year Vision
Become a major league baseball player, like his hero Mel Ott.
Story
They were playing baseball in a cow pasture, using dried cow patties for bases, when a foul ball got hit into the road. As Dad ran into the road to get the ball, he fell down, and a truck ran right over him. He just lay flat and straight between the wheels, hoping the low differential box wouldn’t hit him. After the truck passed, he retrieved the ball and the game went on.
1937-1946. Age 10-19
Walburg, TX. Austin, TX. River Forest, IL
3 Themes
Athletics
Picking cotton
Leaving Texas
10-year Vision
Become a teacher at a Lutheran school in rural Texas, just like his dad.
Story
The first time he left Texas, he was on a train in the north and all the cars on the train had both white people and black people. He asked the conductor where the white car was–not because he didn’t want to sit next to black folks, but because he had no idea that on some trains they all travelled together. The conductor told him, “White boy, you ain’t in the South no more.” Lesson learned.
1947-1956. Age 20-29
River Forest, IL. Tracy, CA. Glendale, CA
3 Themes
Jane and Dave
California
School teacher and principal
10-year Vision
Get a PhD on the side, and teach at a Lutheran Teachers College
Story
Tracy, CA was the first of many low-paying, long-hour jobs that Dad threw himself into. Just as in his childhood when his father was the principal and teacher at a small, rural, Lutheran school, the new family of three was often compensated “in kind,” with gifts of fruit, nuts and meat. Decades later, every Christmas we would still receive a variety box of cans of different flavored almonds, grown by the Paulson family back in Tracy.
1957-1966. Age 30-39
Kowloon, HK. San Antonio, TX. Maywood, IL
3 Themes
Hong Kong
4 more kids
Vastly expanded world view
10-year Vision
Create a self-sustaining Christian educational system in Hong Kong, run by Chinese, built on the principle of first giving parents what they want for their children–a solid academic education–and letting the western missionaries bear witness to their faith through their actions. This was in contrast to the prevailing vision he inherited, which was an educational system controlled by white Americans that started by converting students to Christianity, and taught academics on the side.
Story
A teacher came to the principal with a problem: a student was discovered to be in possession of an inappropriate magazine. Dad looked it over and saw that it was something called “Mad Magazine” (a favorite of Tim and John years later). He looked at it and determined it was neither pornography nor communist propaganda, so he gave it back to the kid and told him to pay attention in class. Dad swore that the kid was John Woo who went on to direct dozens of Hong Kong action classics as well as Hollywood blockbusters like Face/Off and Mission Impossible II. Dad also told us John Woo’s introduction to film production was creating film strips of Bible stories for the elementary school.
1967-1976. Age 40-49
Maywood, IL. Ann Arbor, MI. St. Louis, MO
3 Themes
Moving through 4 cities and jobs
The 60’s (further expanded world view)
A wrenching split in the Church Dad had dedicated his life to
10-year Vision
Lead Lutheran education globally to a more creative, Gospel-based approach relevant to the modern world.
Story
Dad had just resigned his job working for the Missouri Synod, over what he saw as a fundamentalist take-over of the Church. He had not lined up a new job. After a career that had always seemed to go up, each job more prestigious than the last, it seemed as if his professional life had peaked. As he wrote in his blog, it was at that moment that a conversation with his sixteen-year-old daughter Peggy brought him back from the brink and made him realize that the future was full of possibilities.
1977-1986. Age 50-59
Encinitas, CA. Tuckahoe, NY. Eastchester, NY
3 Themes
Parent Effectiveness Training
New understanding of sexual diversity as something not to be fixed, or tolerated, but celebrated
Workshop facilitation
10-year Vision
Create a structured world-wide movement of collaborative problem solving in all types of relationships.
Story
One day a principal of a Lutheran elementary school in NY came to him with a quandary. Drug dealers were approaching children just outside of the playground.The principal wanted to protect the children but knew that legally he could not cross the perimeter of the school to confront the drug dealers. What was the right thing to do? Dad did not hesitate. “There is only one answer. Your job is to protect the children. Cross the border.”
1987-1996. Age 60-69
Eastchester, NY. Carlsbad, CA
3 Themes
Urban Education
The Big Apple
Retirement
10-year Vision
Shepherd urban schools into a new future of multiculturalism and women’s leadership.
Story
The day after the tanks rolled in, on June 5th, 1989, Dad, Tim and John had train tickets from Beijing to Xian. We found a taxi driver who said he could get us to the Beijing train station through back streets. When the traffic clogged, the driver got out to see what the holdup was. He ran back to tell us the road was blocked by overturned buses and burned vehicles, and he told us to lie on the floor of the van. We heard shots fired. The driver drove us down a series of side alleys, weaving through panicked crowds. We could see the smoke rising from Tiananmen Square as we pulled into the back of the train station. Dad offered the driver a tip, but he refused. Dad insisted. When we got on the train to Xian, we immediately heard rumors that in Xian protesters were blocking entry to the city with buses, and that troops were amassing for an assault in the north.
1997-2006. Age 70-79
Carlsbad, CA
3 Themes
Leading international tours
Transition from global service to local service
Retirement #2 , Retirement #3…
10-year Vision
To shoot his age on the golf course at least once each year
Story
Chengdu, Lhasa, Shigatse. It had been a long trip. Dad and the tour group he was leading, along with me, his son John, flew from Kashgar to Urumqi late and went to the hotel for four hours before heading back to the airport for an early morning flight to Dunhuang. A bus met us at the airport to take us directly to the famous Buddhist Caves there for a tour. I was tired and cranky, but didn’t dare complain, since all of the old-timers Dad had brought from Calvary Lutheran Church were cheerful and curious and full of energy. All the while, Dad bounced around the bus talking to everyone—a greatest generation moment.
2007-2016. Age 80-89
Carlsbad, CA
3 Themes
Blogging/Mel's Myths & Memories
Trying to work less
Staying connected with family and friends
10-year Vision
Slow down
Story
Mom and Dad had a hot tub installed on the balcony outside their bedroom. They could take in the sunset, soaking outside in a hot tub overlooking Batiquitos Lagoon and the ocean beyond, night after night, the retiree’s dream. That was, until they accidentally locked the bedroom door behind them and were trapped on the balcony at night without their clothing. Dad, channeling his athletic past, shimmied down from the second-story balcony in his 85-year old birthday suit, crept around the house, shimmied open a window out front and climbed in by the light of the moon.
2017-2024. Age 90-97
Carlsbad, CA
3 Themes
Continuing to deepen his relationship with Jane
Stopped golfing
“I used to be aging. Now I am aged.”
10-year Vision
Find out what comes after
Story
Tim tells the story: We were at the 3rd amazing restaurant of the day–a traditional country-style Chinese-Portuguese restaurant in Macau called Fernando’s, celebrating Dad’s 90th birthday with Chinese friends. Over after-dinner drinks, one of his former students leaned over to me and said, “You see us all giving so much honor to your father, even though he was in Hong Kong over 50 years ago. So many of us have lived successful, meaningful, full lives since then. Is it all because of your father? No, we worked hard, we made some good decisions, we had our share of good fortune and God’s blessings. But we honor your father because our lives are like a long line of dominoes leading us to the present, and your father tipped over the first domino. Without him the rest of the dominoes would never have fallen.”
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