Wedding Anniversary

Today is the 59th wedding anniversary of Jane and me. As I recall my expectations of that day so many years ago I realize what an optimistic and idealist young guy I was. Yet it’s even more true that my dreams have come true, my idealism was too limited, my expectations too narrow

Who could ever imagines the life we have been sharing. Our five kids, eight grandkids and the in-laws that go with all that continue to amaze and bless us. The shifts in vocation and settings for our life are in sharp contrast to what we then anticipated. Both of us then imagined very satisfying lives as teachers and possibly as principal in Lutheran parochial schools. And that could have been great. But we never dreamed of international career opportunities, service around the world, colleagues at many levels of organizations and foci as broad as our faith and as interesting as interpersonal communications.

All of this in the midst of drama and trauma, Infant daughter Elizabeth in intensive care on Christmas Eve fighting for every breath. Leaving a classroom in Kowloon just minutes before bullets streamed in from a rioting crowd outside. Flying across the Pacific with kids in tow and Jane in a coma with a cerebral aneurysm. Scrambling out of Tiananmen Square as the Chinese army moved in and mowed down protesting students (and then being unable to communicate with home for three days). Years later being stranded for days in the Far East when terror struck the World Trade Center.

Living together in 17 different apartments, homes, condos and a retirement community.

Remarkable evenings out together for dinner at places as exotic as Gaddis in the Peninsula Hotel, the top of the World Trade Center, Hawaiian beachfront lounges; and also including the best available fish stomach soup enjoyed with very poor refugee colleagues in Kowloon.

And how our Christmas card lists have changed through these 59 years, ever expanding, names being deleted, memories being amassed and support experienced beyond all reasonable expectations.

Religious perspectives deepened, faith became more profound, greater acceptance of mystery, ever-expanding inclusiveness of who is within God’s providence and care.

Increased sensitivity and skills in listening, resolving differences, sharing dreams, and disappointment and fears and deep and growing love.

No this is not what I could ever have imagined 59 years ago and yet it has all transpired and I know who and Whom to thank. On this day, too, I look not only backwards but also forward, knowing that forgiveness, love, acceptance and partnership will only be enhanced even as the number 59 moves to the next decade.