Reflections on Retirement: 3 Satisfying Days

I’ve been retired now for more than 22 years and it has been good. I am blessed to live with Jane, my wife of 6e4 years. The retirement community in which we live is wonderful. Our health is good. Our congregation, Calvary Lutheran in Solana Beach is supportive.

Probably the best thing about retirement in contrast to my previous working environment is that I do not feel responsible for an organization and I actually go through a whole week without any meetings.

Into this environment there come some special days that are extraordinarily satisfying. I recently had 3 of such days.

Day One: I had a terrible cough my body was weak. I did a most unusual thing. I stayed in bed late. At 10:00 a.m. the phone rang. A volunteer at church called. She knew I had volunteered to fill in if there was any emergency situation as our pastor was out of town. She told me that a phone message from the previous day (Sunday) said someone was dying and there was a need for a pastoral call. My initial response was negative. “I’m not feeling well. Pr. ‘N’ is also on call; he could do this- and why is yesterday’s message being responded to only today?”

But I acted. My phone follow-up gave me the message, “Ellen is not just very sick. She is at the point of death.”

I hurried over. I was greeted by Mary whom I soon discovered was the best, kindest, most able and compassionate hospice care provide I have ever met. Ellen was indeed dying but conscious. I stroked her arm. I spoke into her ears and looked in her eyes. I recalled happy days. I read to her from John’s Gospel, “In my Father’s House are many mansions. I go to prepare a place for you.” Together with her care giver we recited the 23^rd psalm. I prayed a prayer and we did a ritual for those dying.

I asked if it would be possible to have Holy Communion. The aide assured me it was. I was concerned about Ellen swallowing even a little bread and wine. But the caregiver provided a small syringe. We consecrated the sacramental elements, merged them, put them into the syringe and we three partook of the blessed elements, I spoke the Biblical blessing and left.

Twenty minutes later I arrived home. Jane said we’d had a phone call from Ellen’s caregiver. Ellen had died a few minutes after I left. She had let go. She died in peace.

I was grateful to have been a part of a day very well spent.

Day Two: Memorial Day

The retirement community in which we live includes a great many retired US Military personnel. Since we are near San Diego and Camp Pendleton there are especially many former Navy and Marine veterans. Memorial Day rituals are a big thing here.

But this year I decided to observe Memorial Day (Veterans Day) “off campus”. I volunteered to feed the homeless at TACO (Third Avenue Charitable Organization) at First Lutheran in downtown San Diego.

 So I gathered with the 20 or so volunteers to meet them and get acquainted, to get our arrangements and to have a community prayer. I was honored to be asked to lead that prayer.

Soon the 2000+ guests arrived and gathered din the church courtyard. We had a special birthday cake for those who had birthday in May. I was again asked to lead the prayer. But first I asked all veterans to raise their hands. Tragically there were more than a dozen now living on the street, homeless and hungry. I thanked God for their (and all veterans’) contribution to preserving American\’s best values.

As they all marched through the food line I tried to look into each face, the mentally ill, those on drugs, women, men, children, all colors and ethnicities, each one a hungry brother or sister.

They all responded in gratitude, humbly and sincerely. As long as the food lasted they could come back for seconds or thirds – or even for take-out.

I wished them all God’s blessings and drove back home to my well supplied and secure home. And I felt good about my small role on the different kind of Memorial Day – a day well spent.

Day Three: Committee meeting

I mentioned above that one of the blessings of retirement is the greatly reduced number of meetings one is required to attend.

Yet I recently chaired a very small Committee meeting. On the face of it, it sounds like the dullest of all possible committee meetings.

I chair the Governance Committee of a local organization called Survivors of Torture International. We provide a safe haven, psychosocial support and immigration support to persons who have fled to the USA to escape government sanctioned torture now so very common in too many parts of the world.

I’ve spent my life working for “not-for-profit” organizations so it is no big deal for me to help our organization with training board members, putting in place staff succession processes, ensuring proper accounting. So my committee does that. The three other committee members all know their stuff, bringing competence, compassion and commitment. So we did our thing for a couple of hours.

Really all very simple and straightforward. Yet as I drove home that evening I felt satisfied. I was using my time, talents and experience so that others might find a life much better than what they had experienced in their home country. It was a satisfying day for me.