Weddings I

 I have just agreed to preside at the wedding of my grandson Ryan and his bride Jill. It’s scheduled for the 4^th of July in the backyard of his parents Liz and Jim in W. Hartford CT. I write this as the coronavirus is spreading and I am hoping that will all be pretty much history by the time we fly across the USA. Planning for that wedding which they want to be “very, very simple” reminds me of the most recent weddings at which I have presided.

Three recent weddings have all been for same sex marriages, something I would never have even dreamed of when Jane and I got married 68 years ago. One of those weddings was indeed the “most simple” possible. A lesbian couple had been together for years. Finally their marriage could be legal. They wanted me to just “do the legal minimum”. We stood together at a kitchen counter. I asked each, “Do you take her as your spouse?” They both said “Yes.” And that was it (I should add that since they did not want to have a religious ceremony I said my own silent prayer.)

Another recent marriage of two gay persons was of a grand-niece in Texas. It was a beautiful ceremony in a beautiful outdoor central Texas setting. It was joyful and celebratory but I could also feel the tension of family members who were not approving of the marriage and yet wanted the best for this wonderful couple.

The wedding before that was somewhat out of the norm as well. The groom was getting married just 6 months after I had presided at the memorial of his wife of more than 50 years. The bride in this case had also recently buried her husband. The newly married pair had known each other for years and they are now a very happy and blessed couple.

The wedding before that one was really different. The bride is the biggest Disney Land fan in the world and that is where she wanted her wedding. However, she did not want to deal with all the restrictions, protocols and costs of it being “an official Disney” wedding. She wanted guests at the wedding. And she wanted it to be a surprise for all. So we just casually gathered at Disney World, stood around an entrance to one of the rides as I quietly asked for and heard their very brief and casual vows. Then we went to a restaurant there and celebrated. The  marriage is a great success and Disney Land is joyfully visited by the bride on a very regular basis.

 A joyful memory of weddings comes almost every week as I see the very first couple that I married some 25 years ago now always show up for Sunday worship at Calvary Lutheran Church.